In Hauts-de-France, guest houses welcome caregivers in search of respite

Sitting on her terrace in front of the entrance to her gîte, Murielle Goubert breathes. Her daughter, Kérenna, has just left for a walk in the marshes, accompanied by a home help. The 52-year-old mother will be able to treat herself to three hours of relaxation. “I’m going to take a little time for myself,” she says, enjoying a ray of sunshine despite the mixed summer weather. Aged 22, Kérenna has suffered from motor and intellectual disabilities since birth. Murielle wears the dual role of mother and caregiver: “I’m looking after a completely dependent person. If I don’t give myself a break, when will I be able to do it?”

To recharge her batteries, Murielle rented accommodation at Bobos à la ferme, in Madelaine-sous-Montreuil (Pas-de-Calais). Over the years, the place has become a model for respite for caregivers in France. A project nourished by the personal history of the two founders, Élodie and Louis Dransart, parents of Andréa, a little girl with multiple disabilities, who died last May, at the age of 8. When Andréa was born, the life of this couple from the Paris region changed radically. Their daughter suffers from an orphan and neurodegenerative disease. As for many caregivers, reconciling a full-time job and the heavy care of Andréa became impossible for them. Élodie therefore left her job in the social and solidarity economy; Louis, his job as director of a social establishment.

The family decided to settle in this corner of Pas-de-Calais, where Louis grew up, and bought a ruined farm there, which they restored. “Looking back, it was a completely crazy challenge,” says Louis. “With no income, we said to ourselves: ‘fucked for fucked, let’s go!’ Our mantra was: build to rebuild.” A successful bet. In 2016, the place became Les Bobos à la ferme, a reception center dedicated to caregivers and their loved ones, of whom there are 9.3 million in France, according to the Research, Studies, Evaluation and Statistics Department (DREES). “We were keen to come up with a solution for them,” says Élodie.

Six hours of freedom

She had barely taken possession of her home when Bénédicte Lambertyn’s face lit up. Accompanied by her son, Mathieu, who suffers from Angelman syndrome, this 65-year-old retiree was setting down her suitcases for the second time at the farm. She was spending a week there. Mathieu would be looked after by a home help for six hours a day. “I have never found a place that was so well-suited for us,” says this mother from Amiens, who is raising her son alone. “Centres for people with disabilities often have a welcoming feel. Here, we feel like everyone else, it feels good.”

A transformed daily life

A cocoon atmosphere accentuated by the layout of the site and the facilities made available to families. The latter can notably enjoy a sensory room, a balneotherapy area or a vegetable garden nestled in the heart of a green setting. “Daily life is difficult at home,” continues Bénédicte Lambertyn. After our first stay here, Mathieu and I left more zen, which is what pushed us to come back.”

In its eight years of existence, the project has become a model. Last May, Les Bobos à la ferme even received a visit from the Minister Delegate for the Elderly and Disabled, Fadila Khattabi. “It’s a place where you feel at home, a truly magical place. It’s not a closed establishment, with white and grey walls, where everything is sad,” she declared during a visit to the site, praising “an innovative and inspiring project.” Today, the Bobos team includes nearly ten employees, not counting the dozen volunteer caregivers and partners. Each year, the occupancy rate of the gîtes climbs. And like Bénédicte Lambertyn and Murielle Goubert, many families repeat the experience. “Now, we have a hard time seeing ourselves on vacation anywhere else,” confide the two caregivers.