Boiling heart

Cover a pilgrimage to Lourdes? Funny professional mission. I’m going to get bored, I thought by imagining the pilgrims waiting to be able to touch the rock of the cave, wash with swimming pools, or light a candle. Here I am at the opening of the pilgrimage, in the underground basilica. A kind of concrete hangar, gigantic, ugly. The building fills up. Mass begins. On all sides of the nave, I notice the dozens of great hangings representing saints, witnesses. See the crowd, hear him sing, pray, wake my faith. Am I not so believing, although lukewarm sometimes? It doesn’t take long for me to feel included in this fervent assembly. Later, in front of the cave, with swimming pools, I observe the pilgrims. So various. Coming from all continents, perhaps, depositing their illnesses at the feet of Jesus and Mary. Their weakness.

Emotion wins me. The momentum of these heavily disabled people, ready to do anything to touch the rock, their faith, their hope, touches me deeply. Am I not too concerned? I pretend to be strong, but by them, the Lord gets rid of the pride which I have a shell. Here are my fears, my anxieties, my lively doubts, in front of him.

A well -known pain that I usually keep at a distance as I can. My heart goes from halfway to mid-chaud. I go to the swimming pools where we practice “the gesture of water”, according to the request of the virgin transmitted by Bernadette: “Go drink and wash you at the fountain. Docile, I let myself be driven by volunteers. We tell a I greet you Marie, then: “You can wash your face with the water I pour on your hands. »»

And here are tears overwhelming me, mixed with water flowing on my face. Tears of joy: Christ welcomes me as I am, he knows me, he seeks me, joins me. I can tell him everything. With a boiling heart, I leave the space of the pools. Outside, it rains strings, an additional sign for me of the blessing of the sky. We will not see my tears. I take refuge in the shelter in the candles space and light up several for the members of my family. Quiet, released, I open my heart to the Lord. I glimpsed that day the end of the tunnel.